What Rudyard Kipling's 'If' really teaches us about resilience at work

It's confession time on National Poetry Day. I have never really got poetry. Yes, we did it at school, but to be honest, during most of those lessons I tuned out. Poetry simply didn’t capture my imagination until I came across this poem by Rudyard Kipling.

Looking back at my career, this one line has always stayed close to me:

"If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you"

It comes to mind every time I face a crisis, a difficult meeting or a contentious decision. But Kipling’s message is more complicated than simply telling us to stay calm and carry on.

Why "If" is more than an inspirational poem.

“If” is such a simple two-letter word, but somehow the genius of Rudyard Kipling turns this word into timeless advice. I love its simplicity and clarity, and yet it has a depth when you look into each line. There is a saying that there is nothing new under the sun. And as I get older, I am beginning to appreciate that more and more.

You may associate Rudyard Kipling more with his book The Jungle Book, which Disney so wonderfully brought to the world. What a film (and soundtrack). Showing my age, I know!

But what you may not have been aware of is that Rudyard Kipling was also a celebrated poet, and “If” is one of his best-known works. It was first published in 1910 in his collection Rewards and Fairies.

The poem takes the form of paternal advice from an older man to a younger one. Its subject is character: how we behave when confronted by doubt, dishonesty, success, failure, exhaustion and pressure.

That is what makes the poem relevant to our working life more than a century later.

A copy of 'If' hangs on my office wall. It acts as a reminder not of how I always behave, but of how I should behave when the going gets tough.

Kipling himself remains a contested figure, but finding value in one poem does not require us to endorse every political opinion held by its author. We can still examine the words and what they might still teach us.

Five workplace lessons from 'If'

1. Keeping calm under pressure is composed leadership

“If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you…”

Think about a meeting in which panic, politics or pressure is pushing people towards a bad decision. Remaining calm doesn't mean sitting silently or pretending that nothing is wrong. It means resisting the urge to add more heat when what the situation calls for is clearer thinking.

The person who can separate facts from fear, slow down a rushed decision and ask the question everyone else has overlooked can change the direction of the conversation.

Don't mistake keeping your head for inaction. It’s actually one of the most powerful tools you have as a leader.

2. Confidence should leave room for doubt

“If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, but make allowance for their doubting too…”

Kipling doesn't tell us to ignore our critics and believe that we are always right. He combines self-confidence with humility.

That is valuable advice for any manager. You need sufficient confidence to defend a well-founded recommendation, particularly when it is unpopular. But you also need enough humility to examine why other people disagree.

They may lack information. They may have misunderstood your proposal. They may be protecting their own interests. Or they may have spotted something you have missed.

The objective isn't to surrender your judgement to every critic. It's to listen without allowing either confidence or doubt to control you completely.

3. Integrity matters most when it becomes inconvenient

“Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies, or being hated, don’t give way to hating…”

Workplace politics can pull decent people into behaviour they are not proud of.

When someone misrepresents your position, excludes important facts or attempts to shift responsibility, retaliation can feel justified. It is tempting to answer exaggeration with exaggeration or to begin conducting your own campaign behind the scenes.

That may provide momentary satisfaction, but it can also damage the reputation you are trying to protect.

Integrity is relatively easy when everything is going well. Its real test comes when acting with integrity appears to put you at a disadvantage.

This doesn't mean allowing false statements to stand. Correct the record. Produce the evidence. State your position firmly.

But don't become the behaviour you are challenging.

4. Failure is something we experience, but it's not who we are

“Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, and stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools…”

Most experienced managers have watched something they worked hard to create fail or disappear. I know I have!

A product is cancelled. A reorganisation pulls apart a team. A strategy changes after months of work. A new leader abandons the previous leader’s priorities. The professional lesson is not that we should feel nothing. Disappointment is a reasonable reaction when something important is lost.

Resilience lies in what we do next.

Can we distinguish the failure of a project from a failure of personal worth? Can we identify what remains useful? Can we apply what we have learnt without carrying resentment into the next piece of work?

Starting again is painful. Sometimes it really does feel as though we are rebuilding with worn-out tools. Yes, it remains one of the most valuable abilities we can develop.

5. Resilience is not endless endurance

“And so hold on when there is nothing in you except the will which says to them: ‘hold on!’”

This is stirring advice, but it needs to be applied carefully at work. Resilience doesn't mean putting up with unreasonable demands in silence. Keeping calm is not the same as keeping quiet. Holding on is not always the same as staying put.

There are circumstances in which perseverance is courageous. There are others in which it merely allows a damaging situation to continue. Sometimes the resilient response is to challenge a decision, document what has happened, ask for help, establish a boundary or leave a harmful situation deliberately rather than reactively.

The important question is not simply, 'Can I endure this?' Instead it's, 'What am I trying to achieve by enduring it, and is endurance still the best available choice?'

Applying SAFE when pressure rises

Kipling gives us principles. The SAFE Method helps turn those principles into action.

Situation - What has actually happened?

Separate the facts from the emotion, assumptions and noise surrounding them. What decision has been made? What words were used? What are you being asked to do and by whom?

Alternatives - What realistic choices do you have?

Look beyond the two immediate reactions of fighting back or silently putting up with the situation. Could you ask for clarification, propose another approach, delay a decision, escalate the matter or seek independent advice?

Firm Words - What needs to be said clearly?

State your position calmly and precisely. Avoid threats, dramatic declarations or ambiguous language that could accidentally make the situation worse.

You can be composed without being compliant.

Evidence - What might you later need to demonstrate?

Retain the relevant emails, objectives, decisions and meeting notes. Confirm important conversations in writing. Evidence is more reliable than memory, particularly when responsibility is being disputed.

Kipling tells us to keep our heads. SAFE helps us decide what to do once we have.

The lessons I take from 'If'

The full poem: 'If' by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,

Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,

And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream and not make dreams your master;

If you can think and not make thoughts your aim;

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken

Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,

And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone,

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or walk with Kings, nor lose the common touch,

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,

If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute,

With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it.

And, which is more, you’ll be a Man, my son!

Character when it is difficult

'If' doesn't provide a technique for winning every workplace battle. It offers something more fundamental: a standard for how we conduct ourselves when pressure, failure and other people’s behaviour threaten to pull us off course.

• Keep your head but do not become passive.

• Listen to doubt but do not surrender your judgement.

• Persevere but do not mistake endless endurance for resilience.

  
  

Character matters most when the workplace makes it difficult to hold on to yours.

Visit Kipling's home at Batemans in East Sussex, UK

If the poem interests you, I would highly recommend a visit to Kipling's former home, Batemans, in the East Sussex village of Burwash, UK (TN19 7DS). Today, the house and gardens are managed by the National Trust. It’s a great day out, and as a bonus, Burwash is a beautiful village that is also worth an explore.https://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/visit/sussex/batemans